Monday 31 October 2011

Inuit

They say the Inuit Eskimos have over 100 words for snow. Thats **** all, I've just had a look on match.com and women have well over 1000 words for fat.

Sunday 30 October 2011

Patronus

Is your patronus a cake?

Mcdonalds

Why is it that pubs won't serve me if I'm drunk but McDonald's continue serving the fatties? It's hardly fair.

Thursday 13 October 2011

Fat Girl

Nobody wants a fat girl, and your dad doesn't want to be the one stuck paying your hospital bills when you're so big you can't move.

Wednesday 12 October 2011

Distraction

Distracting fat people is easy... it's a piece of cake.

Tuesday 11 October 2011

Donut Holes

I throw donut holes at fat people.

Monday 10 October 2011

Karma

Karmas a bitch, but you didn't have to eat her and her whole family. Damn!

Sunday 9 October 2011

Kidnap

Fat people are hard to kidnap.

Saturday 8 October 2011

Did You Say Something?

Did you just say something, or was it sucked back in because of your gravitional field?

Friday 7 October 2011

One At A Time

You stepped on a talking scale and it said "One at a time"

Thursday 6 October 2011

Talking And Walking

Well hey! At least my ass doesn't talk when I walk!

Wednesday 5 October 2011

Elvis

You're so fat, Elvis would revive and sing you a donut song

Tuesday 4 October 2011

Hey Fatty Fatty

Hey Fatty-Fat-Fat. Who's a big fat man. Yeeeees, you are.

Monday 3 October 2011

Jumping

Better not do that again! I'm surprised you didnt break through the floor!

Family Guy

This one is from family guy :) Security Guard: Alright son, we're gonna need those two hams back. Chris: Huh? I don't have any hams. Guard: Lift up your shirt, son. Chris: I need an adult! I need an adult! Guard: You're not a shoplifter, you're just a fat kid. Sorry about that fatty fat fatty. Hey Tom he's just a fat kid! Aren't you, fatty? You're just a big ol' fat kid. Here's some chocolate fatso. Chris: Thanks.